Memoire 1-Walk With Armoured Tanks

Walk With Armoured Tanks 

1969 to 2000, 31 long years. Years, which took to transform Sagar, that is me from a small child of 11 years to a man of 42 years, but it did not wipe out complete memories from my mind. May be I had memory of elephant, as I have learnt that they have long memory.

I was in Pathankot after 31 years on an assignment of couple of days and that kindled my memories of five years I spent in the small town. The town where a student of class 4 would go to market with just five paise in hand and buy two vegetables. A town where a 25 paisa as pocket money was more than sufficient for not for the month but for three months. Or a town where the neighborhood sweet meat shop will ask you to help him in something, may be pouring water on his hand, on his dough or just peeling potatoes, play with you with his words asking about what the child is learning in school and after some time give the child a Samosa or a Sweet as his reward.

A small town where all neighbors were guardians and all have the right to scold a child of the street if they saw the child doing anything wrong. And child, he did not have any authority to complain to his parents about the scolding received from neighbors. A town where if accompanying mother to market, you always received one of toffee or just Jaggery just free from shopkeeper uncles! (It was called chunga)

And as I was roaming now, a man of 42, in a hired cab, went to the then houses, and thought, how I could muster courage in those days of full submission to the order of the day. 

Yes, on a day, after lunch I was playing in front of the house with some other children likely of my age. Elders were inside and in those times elders never had the time or inclination of supervising child 24/7. If I have been allowed, none was bothered about me. There was no transport or associated risks.

All the boys, yes, boys were alerted with a sound of moving machines. Within seconds all of us ran towards the road expecting a massive scene. It was there, line of battle tanks were coming from the side of Kathua and going to the other side. In the case of any such convoy, or even a goods train passing, counting the number of number was an interesting game. The small road and single railway line ran just near our house. We started counting the Tanks, including discussing about how many enemy soldiers they might have killed or story telling about how much ammunition each of them stored inside their belly. Few of us started walking with the convoy. And I was running, trying to cover from start to end. None of us had any idea about the time in our enthusiasm. 

While I kept on walking and running with the tanks, analyzing their fire power, appreciating and dreaming that one day I could be inside one of them, the day was coming to an end, and the I realized my folly only when the tanks put their lights on. The roads were dusty and movement of so many tanks was leaving cloud of dust behind them, and I was colored with dust by that time. 

By the time I really realized that I have been walking with the tanks for too long, I also realized that it was dark all around, that the railway line has already turn towards the Pathankot Junction and the Tanks have moved towards the road towards Gurdaspur /Amritsar. And then the fear set in, oh, it is too far, dark, how I will go home! Even if I reach, whether I will be allowed entry!

All the energy with which I was running with the Tanks suddenly fizzled out, watching the Tanks moving away leaving the lovely cloud of dust, vanishing lights, I started walking back to house, slowly, in total contrast to my speed with the Tanks. 

Lots of thoughts criss crossing the mind, what will happen on reaching house, whether I will be forced to stay out for the night, whether I will get the dinner, and what not. The thoughts were sufficient in bringing moisture in my eyes.

And then, in the total pitch dark night and with lots of vegetation around, I saw someone coming with a light. Well, let me tell the readers, torches and lanterns were very common in those days. And this individual with torch was coming from opposite direction. My mind was occupied with my fears, and in the midst of fears, dreams of driving the Tanks.

The person came straight to me and put the high power light of torch straight to my eyes. It was blinding. I meekly shouted, what a 10 year old man can do, hey, who are you, leave my way, let me go home. And the reply froze me. It was my elder brother, So, you remember to come back to house. Why? didn't you get any food anywhere? Didn't any one did not allow to enter home so now you want to go home. You know, how everyone is angry. Just come with me, you will never dare to be out of house for so long.

With that, the iron fist (well, he is elder only by four years, but at that moment, he was the guardian) he started dragging me towards house. Even with all the fears of scolding and beating, if any, I was sure of at least one thing, will get an entry into house and also get dinner.

And at last, the house. A couple of slaps, some more predictions, you want to drive Tanks, if you behave in this manner, you will only drive cows and not even bicycle. And the like, which when I look back, I just smile at them and say, oh, I miss them, miss those discipline commands. 

The driver of the cab has been going around, he realized that I had lost myself in past. He entered Sujanpur village and stopped at a tea shop. Shop owner was a young man, less than 20, so there was no use of broaching the topic. I bought the cup of tea, and sipped the tea with the smell of this small town, the village, everything was lost somewhere in the intervening period.

Sat in the car again, and rushed back to the Railway station and for once, bid good bye to the town, the unknown town now, in which we left our childhood.

June 3, 2020